Matthew under the arm 95

In the afternoon, Columba and I were walking rather slowly. He had been quiet for over an hour, obviously thinking deeply about something. Eventually he asked, 'Did you notice...? That man who came into the hostel with us last night, kept asking me questions...'
'So? He was so boring. Asking you about the meaning of evil; whether strong belief is essential..... You didn't really answer him convincingly.'
'Because there aren't convincing answers to these questions.'
'Well. Why were you are thinking about him so much.'
'Because his questions weren't his real questions.... He was asking something that he felt he couldn't ask directly.....'

Matthew 19:27-30….
The edgy question: ‘What’s in it for me?’ is important. Perhaps, Jesus wouldn't have had any disciples unless they felt that there was something in it for them: some wanting recognition in the face of anonymity; some wanting power in the coming of the new kingdom… These questions, asked in a thousand different ways, are in effect based on basic questions that are sometimes to hard for us to ask: ‘Am I going to be affirmed?’ or ‘Do you love me?’ Any organisation, including a Christian one, cannot function effectively unless there is something ‘in it for those who participate’. The Kingdom is marked by the gifts of affirmation and love. Jesus recognised the importance of that. His execution was all the more devastating for him as few stayed with him. Perhaps there was nothing in it for them after all!

That I may be still and receive Your Acceptance, Your Love and Your Hope

No matter how busy you may or may not be (and remember the uncomfortable fact is you may have chosen to be busy!), look at your activities recently and be aware of the ways you have asked for affirmation no matter how indirectly, materially or emotionally. What do you feel about that seeking? Then take those circumstances into silence and imagine yourself once again seeking that ‘reward’. Jesus does not condemn the seeking. Now turn to Jesus, and imagine you are wanting the same from Him now…. Notice what happens and use the sentence to deepen your desire.

+Martin
Argyll and The Isles